Lido Beach 102410.
About Me
- Alyx
- I'm Alyx. I don't drink, smoke, do drugs, or have sex. I'm in a committed long distance relationship. I majored in fine arts at an art high school in NC. I now live in Sarasota, FL and major in photography. I take photos because I love making people feel beautiful. All my self portraits are taken in my bathroom. I don't claim to know a lot about photography, but I want to learn and that's what matters.
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Saturday, September 18, 2010
My name is Alyx.
I don't drink, smoke, do drugs, or have sex. I want to believe that I don't need to do any of these to have a good time.
But college has made it hard. I feel like there aren't many people here that consider me a real friend because I don't do these things with them. I'll go out with the smokers and drinkers, but sit there in my sobriety, feeling alone and out of place. In the times I choose not to go with them, I spend my free time alone in my dorm room, cleaning up the empty alcohol cans and bottles from the floor - none of them are ever mine. Most times, I'm never invited to do anything with anyone because everyone knows that I'm so boring.
Every day, every night, there's always cigarettes and alcohol. Every day, I feel more and more alone.
I love Ringling. I love college. And I refuse to give in to peer pressure.
I just wish people tried to get to know me better as a person, not a stick in the mud.
But college has made it hard. I feel like there aren't many people here that consider me a real friend because I don't do these things with them. I'll go out with the smokers and drinkers, but sit there in my sobriety, feeling alone and out of place. In the times I choose not to go with them, I spend my free time alone in my dorm room, cleaning up the empty alcohol cans and bottles from the floor - none of them are ever mine. Most times, I'm never invited to do anything with anyone because everyone knows that I'm so boring.
Every day, every night, there's always cigarettes and alcohol. Every day, I feel more and more alone.
I love Ringling. I love college. And I refuse to give in to peer pressure.
I just wish people tried to get to know me better as a person, not a stick in the mud.
Sunday, September 5, 2010
From 650 to 315.
Tonight is my last night at home in North Carolina; tomorrow I'm back on the plane(s) to my new home in Sarasota, Florida. So today, I made sure to make plans to see a couple of the friends I'd left behind. I went with a couple of them to see the movie, Going the Distance, and booooy was it great!
It was an accurate portrayal of what it's like to be in a long distance relationship. Of course, excluding the very unique ones with awesome, out-of-the-norm stories. It made me reflect on my own long distance relationship. I thought about all the problems Ben and I have had in the past that was because of distance. I thought of all the little things we tried to do to miss each other less, but to no avail. More importantly, I thought about how much I loved him no matter how impossible people said it would be.
I know there are hundreds, maybe thousands of couples out there that have it worse than we do; some people separated from their significant other by thousands upon thousands of miles, bodies of water, and timezones. But as I see it, distance is distance. We're all apart from the ones we love, separated by too many miles to see each other very often. I only see Ben once a year (this year I was lucky to see him twice), but you know what? That's just how it has to be.
And then the most amazing thing happened. I was accepted to Ringling College of Art and Design in Florida. This was the best news in the world to the girl who was previously 650 miles and 12 hours away from her boyfriend. I'm not going to lie, this was a big reason on why I applied to Ringling in the first place, but I'm happy I did. Ringling is my home now, and I'm completely in love with it. I'm not foreseeing a close to the distance anytime soon, but being in the same state is absolutely wonderful. After all, (SPOILER) that's how Going the Distance ended, right? The distance wasn't completely closed, but there was hope in at least being in the same state.
We're now only separated by roughly 300 miles (depending on what route you take), the distance cut right in half. Which is, ironically, about the same distance at the end of the movie. That's why I could relate to it so much. :] It's strange, though. Being in Florida makes me happy, but I've never felt further away from him. I feel like I still can't see him like I wanted to, and now it only hurts more because we're so close. But there's still much more hope than there ever was before. And in the end, that's all it comes down to - hope.
No amount of miles for any length of time will keep me from loving you, Ben. We WILL see the end.
It was an accurate portrayal of what it's like to be in a long distance relationship. Of course, excluding the very unique ones with awesome, out-of-the-norm stories. It made me reflect on my own long distance relationship. I thought about all the problems Ben and I have had in the past that was because of distance. I thought of all the little things we tried to do to miss each other less, but to no avail. More importantly, I thought about how much I loved him no matter how impossible people said it would be.
I know there are hundreds, maybe thousands of couples out there that have it worse than we do; some people separated from their significant other by thousands upon thousands of miles, bodies of water, and timezones. But as I see it, distance is distance. We're all apart from the ones we love, separated by too many miles to see each other very often. I only see Ben once a year (this year I was lucky to see him twice), but you know what? That's just how it has to be.
And then the most amazing thing happened. I was accepted to Ringling College of Art and Design in Florida. This was the best news in the world to the girl who was previously 650 miles and 12 hours away from her boyfriend. I'm not going to lie, this was a big reason on why I applied to Ringling in the first place, but I'm happy I did. Ringling is my home now, and I'm completely in love with it. I'm not foreseeing a close to the distance anytime soon, but being in the same state is absolutely wonderful. After all, (SPOILER) that's how Going the Distance ended, right? The distance wasn't completely closed, but there was hope in at least being in the same state.
We're now only separated by roughly 300 miles (depending on what route you take), the distance cut right in half. Which is, ironically, about the same distance at the end of the movie. That's why I could relate to it so much. :] It's strange, though. Being in Florida makes me happy, but I've never felt further away from him. I feel like I still can't see him like I wanted to, and now it only hurts more because we're so close. But there's still much more hope than there ever was before. And in the end, that's all it comes down to - hope.
No amount of miles for any length of time will keep me from loving you, Ben. We WILL see the end.
Friday, September 3, 2010
Color my life with the chaos of trouble.
I'm sitting here right now with some great friends, watching (500) Days of Summer, and figured this would be the perfect time for a new blog post.
My roommate Morgan just left today, home-bound for the long Labor Day weekend. But a couple of days ago, she modeled for my latest assignment in Photography. I still haven't fully adjusted to that class yet, but that's a different story made for a separate blog post.
A lot of interesting happened on the shoot. One being that I lost my cell phone. I ended up finding it the following afternoon (the phone feeling like it was 100 degrees) in the grassy field we shot some pictures in. Luck was on my side in so many ways. In all, it was an incredible experience though. This was the first time I actually really paid attention to every detail of my settings and tried to get exposure exactly correct. Anyway, here are a few of the final pics - all unedited.
My roommate Morgan just left today, home-bound for the long Labor Day weekend. But a couple of days ago, she modeled for my latest assignment in Photography. I still haven't fully adjusted to that class yet, but that's a different story made for a separate blog post.
A lot of interesting happened on the shoot. One being that I lost my cell phone. I ended up finding it the following afternoon (the phone feeling like it was 100 degrees) in the grassy field we shot some pictures in. Luck was on my side in so many ways. In all, it was an incredible experience though. This was the first time I actually really paid attention to every detail of my settings and tried to get exposure exactly correct. Anyway, here are a few of the final pics - all unedited.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
College.
Two weeks in, and I can safely say that these have already been the best days of my life. Something about the new Floridian air has made me able to breathe again.
I see everything with more of an open mind now. I look at things for a longer time, and think about them harder. I appreciate everything that happens around me, and all the people I meet - even if they don't think of me in the same way.
I've learned to let my guard down every once in a while and listen to what people are telling me. I've learned what it feels like to be at the bottom, with nowhere to go but up. I've learned that intimidation is my greatest enemy, but that we're all here for the same reason. I've learned to loosen up and just live my life the way it should be lived. I've learned to miss people and memories more genuinely. I've learned to love people and new experiences more affectionately.
And for once in my life, I feel free.
I see everything with more of an open mind now. I look at things for a longer time, and think about them harder. I appreciate everything that happens around me, and all the people I meet - even if they don't think of me in the same way.
I've learned to let my guard down every once in a while and listen to what people are telling me. I've learned what it feels like to be at the bottom, with nowhere to go but up. I've learned that intimidation is my greatest enemy, but that we're all here for the same reason. I've learned to loosen up and just live my life the way it should be lived. I've learned to miss people and memories more genuinely. I've learned to love people and new experiences more affectionately.
And for once in my life, I feel free.
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